Batman Bush Saves the US from Dora the Exploradora, Robin Harper Gawks in Awe

It was quite sad watching Mr. Harper stand alongside presidente-elect Calderón last Thursday, mumbling a few words about how Canada sympathizes with Mexico on Washington's new plan to build a 1200 km stretch of barbed wire fencing to keep all those nasty wetbacks out of God's country (or what was Mexico) but stressing how Canada's situation is really different from Mexico's. It is sad for two reasons: first it shows how Ottawa doesn't have a clue about empathy in Latin American relations; second, it became blatantly obvious that powers-that-be in Ottawa are like bunch of frogs in steamy water, unaware that they're soon to be cooked. They just don't want to admit that Canada is only a step behind their other North American neighbour.

According to Washington, all America wants is to be safe from drug smugglers, terrorists, illegal immigrants and other riff-raft. As George Bush said "[w]e have a responsibility to secure our borders... We take this responsibility seriously." If that is the case, it won't be long wait for the Great Wall of the United States (a gimmicky version of the Chinese original to be sure) separating the Middle Earth from the barbarians across the 49th.

The Thin Edge of the Wedge

But admit it Mr. Bush, you're not worried about the grape and lettuce pickers slipping across the border. After all, they help your neighbours clean scrub on their ranches! Fess up, you're worried about Dora the Explorer, the toddler phenomena par excellence. You're worried about her Spanglish, her charming mejicana smile, her catchy songs and how the US is becoming more and more latino by the minute.

In fact, the idea of Mexicans taking over the US one Dora at a time has some people writing their way into a frenzy. As Cinnamon Stillwell wrote in the San Francisco Chronicle in April of this year,

Indeed, there's more than one way to conquer territory, and a demographic takeover is often more effective than a military one. Mexican nationalist sentiment in favor of "reconquista" or reclaiming the southwestern United States, otherwise known as Aztlan, is no longer confined to the fringes. It has now become a popular sentiment, intoned by Hispanic politicians, professors, activists and students.

Apparently, enough congressmen, Minutemen, and ordinary American citizens shared the same belief and had the clout to convince Bush that a wall was needed.

Needless to say, the Upper Canadian stands with Diego Armando Maradona and presidente-elect Felipe Calderón Hinojosa in condemning the wall. As Calderón said in Mr. Harper presence,

Es deplorable la decisión del Congreso y de Estados Unidos de ir adelante con la ecisión de construir el Muro. No se resuelve nada con eso.

[The decision taken by Congress and the United States to move ahead with the Wall's construction is deplorable. This will resolve nothing. ]

Just where are your cojones Mr. Harper?